Career Advice: Setting Boundaries with Your Boss

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Today, I attended a career advice session that provided some insightful strategies for setting healthy boundaries with your boss. Here’s what I learned:



Understanding Your Manager’s Skillset

Not every manager is equipped with the skills needed to lead effectively. When individual contributors rise to leadership roles without foundational skills, team members often struggle. If you're dealing with an ill-equipped manager, consider these solutions for establishing healthy work boundaries.

Work Boundaries Examples

There are both passive and active approaches to setting boundaries with your manager or coworkers. Passive boundaries might include using technology to signal when you are unavailable, such as silencing Slack notifications or text messages during off-hours. Active boundaries require communication, such as discussing how and when off-hours communication is appropriate and how you prefer to be managed.

Starting on the Right Foot

It’s easier to establish work boundaries at the beginning of a new relationship. When starting a new position or meeting a new manager, try to have an honest conversation about your needs as an employee.

Dealing with a Long-Term Problem

If you’ve been dealing with a boss who doesn’t understand boundaries for an extended period, consider reaching out to your human resources team for help in crafting the boundaries you need.

Creating Boundaries with a Micromanager

Dealing with a micromanager can be challenging, especially if you value autonomy in your work. Create boundaries by reducing their opportunities to intervene. Rather than asking how and when to execute tasks, complete the work and update them afterward. Set your own meetings with a clear agenda to lead the conversation and provide updates only when necessary. Communicate your preferred management style to your boss, as they may be unaware of it.

Maintaining Boundaries Beyond Working Hours

Many industries expect constant availability due to the ease of technology, which can lead to burnout. It’s essential to create firm boundaries around your time commitments outside of working hours. If a boss calls you outside of working hours, you are not obliged to respond immediately. Set the tone for how you want to be treated by following up with a text or email about appropriate times to call.

Handling Unreasonable Requests

If your manager assigns you more work than you can handle, maintain a balance by communicating your limitations. Self-awareness is crucial; you don’t want to turn down work that could help you grow but also don’t want to set yourself up for failure. Let your manager know if you feel ill-prepared and ask for additional support or training.

Establishing Professional Boundaries

Some people prefer to have close, personal friendships with their teams, which is fine. However, if you prefer to keep relationships professional and your boss insists on getting personal, create boundaries. Avoid sharing personal information and keep conversations task-related.

Dealing with a Rude Boss

If your manager is rude, don’t respond in kind. Keep your distance, minimize conversations, and focus on the work. Remind yourself that you won’t have this boss forever and consider switching teams if necessary.

Key Phrases for Setting Boundaries

Using your voice to articulate your needs can help create work-life balance. Here are some phrases to consider:

“I prefer to communicate through [preferred channel] to streamline our communication.”
“Thanks for thinking of me. I enjoy a challenge, but this is outside my skill set.”
“I need time to disconnect and recharge, so I’ll be offline for the [night, weekend, duration of vacation].”
“I appreciate the opportunity, but I’ll need support and guidance to complete this project.”
“I’m not comfortable discussing my personal life at work, but I’m happy to listen and support as a colleague.”
“I would be happy to help, but I need more time.”
“I’m surprised by your feedback. Can I take some time to think about it and digest what you’ve said? Let’s circle back tomorrow.”
“I won’t be able to attend that meeting, but I can provide an update via email.”
“I want to understand what you’re trying to accomplish with this feedback. Can you explain your reasoning?”

Disclaimer
This advice is based on general best practices and may not apply to every situation. Always consider your unique circumstances and consult with HR or a career advisor for personalized guidance.







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